Hedonism

he•don•ism
n.
1. Pursuit of or devotion to pleasure, especially to the pleasures of the senses.
2. Philosophy. The ethical doctrine holding that only what is pleasant or has pleasant consequences is intrinsically good.
3. Psychology. The doctrine holding that behavior is motivated by the desire for pleasure and the avoidance of pain.


Hedonism is one of my favorite words. It’s also one of my favorite philosophies. Some days, I can’t seem to wrap my head around why anyone would not think hedonism is fantastic, and then I remember that not long ago, I believed that hedonism was wrong and that to engage in it was slothful.

Hedonism wasn’t wrong, I was.

Hedonism’s history has been cursed, since the time of the ancient Greeks, by biased assumptions that hedonism was purely the pleasure of the flesh or advocating “sinful” behavior.

Hedonism is derived from the Greek hedone, meaning ‘sweetness’, ‘joy’, or ‘delight’, and refers to theories about the nature and function of pleasure. How could a word whose meaning includes: sweetness, joy and delight possibly be a bad word?

From the time I landed my first job at Dominos Pizza until I was laid off from my IT Manager position in 2007, all I did was go, go, GO! And GO I did. I accumulated material possessions, debt, fatigue and a metabolic disorder. My entire life revolved around work and what my boss thought about me. I was so driven that I could not see the damage I was causing my body or my loved ones. I was a GO machine. And then, one day, I had nowhere to go.

In my haze of spinning around in circles for two weeks figuring out where the job I put in 50+ hours a week for the last four years went, I bought a book. The Hedonism Handbook: Mastering the Lost Arts of Leisure and Pleasure by Michael Flocker. Now, I found it on the end cap of the humor section at Powell’s Books but for me, it should have been in the self help section! I had forgotten how to laugh at myself.

“…a strange and disturbing epidemic seems to have gripped our nation of late in the form of a most ludicrous assumption: “If you avoid all things pleasurable, you will live a long and happy life”. But can happiness really be found scampering along a treadmill in a smoke-free environment, palm-pilot in hand, chasing after the capitalist ideal? Are sixty-hour work weeks, bulging stock portfolios and a packed agenda the keys to the good life? I think not” ~ The Hedonism Handbook: Mastering the Lost Arts of Leisure and Pleasure by Michael Flocker

Well said, Michael. I could not agree more. Where did we lose our motivation to do joyful things simply for the joy of it? What beliefs do we hold which are holding us back from achieving pleasure and in turn happiness?

My belief that if I worked myself to death, increased my rankings in the corporate “rat race”, made a bunch of money and then, well I’m not sure what would come next as I never got to the making a bunch of money part, would somehow equal happiness.

Working myself to death + Higher status at work + Money + “?” = Happiness?

No.

What makes me happy? Being in the company of my friends and family, playing out in the wild, road trips with my husband, continuous learning, personal growth work and facilitating other’s happiness and success. That is what makes me happy. Was I doing ANY of those things while operating under my assumed formula to happiness? No. Why did I keep doing it? Just as Michael Fowler stated, that is the resonating message in society. If you are not kicking butt, 24/7, you are a loser.

So, I picked up the Hedonism Handbook, approaching it with a measure of reluctance, in the end, I embraced it completely. What a treasure. I was able to allow myself the freedom to feel pleasure, something I had categorically denied myself for the previous 10 years.

With my new found freedom I simplified my daily routines to facilitate adventure, pleasure and relaxation. I didn’t feel guilty lazing around in bed all day, eating real butter, or taking a luxuriously long bath. I found that the more I allowed my self to be driven by the procurement of pleasure instead of fleeing from pain, the more I loved life and myself. I began to embrace my humanity, flaws and all. I lost weight, felt better, spent a lot of nights out in the wilderness in a tent and had a great sense of overall wellbeing. Being a hedonist became part of my essence.

Being human, the societal messages do sink in on occasion and I need to remind myself that being happy about who I am , what I do and how I spend my time is valuable to me. I find myself caught up in another sort of race now, a race for my dreams and even in a race to actualize your dreams and goals; you can forget yourself in the process.

Sustainable goals, mindfulness and a general awareness of your state are essential to maintaining a balanced and healthy life. To me, a balanced and healthy life is a happy life.

Take time out for you today, stop “shoulding” all over yourself for a half hour, an hour or even 15 min if that's all you have and just do what you want to do in that moment. Don’t forget to enjoy it. Be a happy hedonist!